Everything's Gotta Go
by PurpleYin
Summary: A little bantery adult interlude in a temple. Inspired by some NSFW artwork of Nate over on tumblr. Chapter 1 has the scenario with Nate/Chloe and chapter 2 the same scenario but with Nate/Harry.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N** : I started writing this years ago, back in 2014, after spotting some NSFW artwork by red-bones on tumblr that had sort of this setting that inspired me. For some reason I liked the idea of doing the two versions, diverging the story that way, no clue why though. Finally getting to dusting it off, rewriting a bit and posting it.

This fic was intitially betaread by curiousitykate when it was in a first draft form but since I've come back to it now years later I'd not found anyone in Uncharted fandom to help beta the fuller/redone version. It has kindly had a go over by anyrei who isn't in the fandom. So it's been betaread but not with as much fandom focus as I usually would try to get done, fair warning.

There's vague UC2 spoilers for the characters and one of the comments by Chloe but not major one. Set vaguely in the past, sometime before the game series.

* * *

Nate/Chloe

* * *

There's a thunk coming from the other chamber followed by a 'goddamit'. Chloe draws her pistol and runs to the antechamber of the temple, edging around the arch into the room where Nate was last seen.

She lowers her gun swiftly when the scene shows Nate is not being tackled by another treasure hunter or held at gun point by a mercenary or any other of the horrors that had flashed through her mind when the noise had shaken her out of her reverie. She'd been gazing upon the dais and its throned Buddha in her assigned room to scope out, not merely wondering how much it was worth but taking a little time to admire its artisanship.

Nate it seems has been busy in here, apparently undressing himself and simultaneously defiling a religious statue by flinging the offending items onto its arms. He's hopping a little intermittently, clearly favouring one side, and if she had to guess she'd say the idol he's holding up in one hand met with his foot unexpectedly.

He's wearing only his holster, his boots – she'd wouldn't risk barefoot in here herself either, tetanus shot or no – and a sheepish grin.

"What's this in aid of?" she asks, trying to tease out an admission from him by not giving him much in the way of a reaction. His nervousness does look cute on his face and she doesn't want to give up the advantage over him right away.

"I thought you might appreciate the view."

"Oh, that's what you thought. Well, you thought right," she stalks over, close as can be without being within his reach, "I _love_ that idol. Is it for me?"

He hefts it into her two outstretched hands from its precarious balance on his palm. There's nowhere to grip on it at all, she sees now and she has to react quickly, drawing it into her body to balance its weight and avoid dropping it as he did. She suspects his haphazard hand-off of it to her was to try to catch her out, turns the tables by having her fumble it almost as much. Luckily she'd managed just fine and so instead he ends up watching her thoughtfully as she examines the idol, no witty remark forthcoming from him on this occasion.

"Certainly a fine specimen," she says, eyes dragging over the fine engraving on the idol, from top to bottom with a tantalizing slowness. Out of the corner of her vision she can see Nate in his full glory but it'd be no good right now to let him know that that is what she's enjoying most. She's gonna let him stew a little longer first.

Nate coughs and she looks up to find his annoyed glare upon her.

"I think you'll find there's more than one of those in this room."

"Yeah, but we can't take the statue with us," she replies, turning around to hide her grin. It's always been way too fun baiting Nate. His ego is just big enough to withstand being taken down a peg or two.

"A few nicks and scratches on it," she comments and turns back around a little, facing him side on but all her attention on the idol, smoothing her hands over it with tenderness, "but nothing that should diminish its worth."

"Uh-huh. I'm gonna leave this thinly concealed analogy with you, I don't think I care for where you're taking it."

He's already hunting down his clothes when she looks up again.

"Sorry to spoil your fun."

He huffs a little as he reaches up to grasp at his scarf on an upper arm of the statue and when he turns back to reply she thinks _possibly_ she went a touch too far given the expression on his face. She probably ought to give him a break when they get back to the lodge later.

"Let me guess, the verbal sparring is more of a turn on than the guy stark naked right in front of you?"

"Oh no, not at all. But why aim for one when you know you can have both."

"So that's what you expect? Take the idol and then..."

"Take you later. I do believe you've got it in one, Nate."

"I'm not that easy," he says gruffly as he shimmies his briefs up to cover his arse.

"Past behaviour begs to differ. Not that I'm complaining, far from it."

He's definitely deliberately facing away from her now, not letting her see more than he has to whilst he gets dressed again. She deserves that; she'd spoilt his fun and now he's doing his best to spoil hers. No more naked Nate for her. At least, not until much much later. He'd never been very good at holding a grudge.

"Excuse me for thinking it'd be nice to have a moment, alone, somewhere spectacular -"

"Sure you weren't thinking romantic? You should know I don't really do that."

"- when no one was shooting at us. For a change."

And that's when bullets start flying. She almost wants to tease Nate about managing to jinx everything but there are slightly more pressing concerns. She flicks her eyes to him every few seconds, willing him to hurry up and actually have her back in this fight. It would be so much funnier to watch Nate hopping around shrugging into his jeans if he wasn't also trying to avoid getting shot, and if she wasn't busy dispatching the poorly trained mercenaries who had finally caught up with them. She'd thought they'd have had a few more minutes of their interlude before this interruption but she'd misjudged that a tad.

When he's eventually fully clothed he shifts into position next to her and she knows it's her cue to move in. They flank the guys sneaking up towards the archway where light is pretty dim.

"Really gets the adrenaline going, don't ya think?" she whispers in his ear as she passes Nate. A roll later and she's where she wants to be, in one piece too despite the crossfire into the room. She risks a brief look to him – he's eyeing her incredulously, shaking his head mostly to himself.

"I bet you think of this as foreplay too," he shouts across the room. The mercenaries must be so confused.

"Wouldn't you like to find out," she quips back before sneaking off to a side corridor she'd spied on the way in. She imagines that remarks causes a pout, that she'd dearly like to see but instead she continues on and swings round the corner to grab the hapless mercenary who'd thought he was sneaking up on them, aware only of Nate to his left. The chap is hauled into the room and slumped unconscious by her feet in a matter of seconds, head cracked against the stone wall. Nate's still laying suppressive fire and there's a possibility no one saw her move. They might still have the element of surprise if anyone else is stupid enough to try the same thing. Either way she's confident these guys are more or less doomed.

Her and Nate make one hell of a team together, whatever room they're in. In the excitement Nate's dropped the conversation entirely, as is perfectly sensible, reduced to half murmured complaints made under his breath that are so common for him in a tight jam.

But she does plan to let him find out later how much she's turned on by him, once they're somewhere with a bed. She's all for naked lovers surprising her. She's just also all for doing it in style _and_ comfort. And a little less sentiment couldn't hurt either, or so she hopes.


	2. Chapter 2

Nate/Harry

* * *

There's a thunk coming from the other chamber followed by a 'goddamit'. Harry eyes up the entrances and exits they know of, giving them a quick once over to make sure there's no sign of anyone having snuck up unseen whilst they'd been examining the wares. When he doesn't spy any movement, he heads towards the antechamber of the temple, where Nate was last seen. He's taking care to sneak into the room, just in case, adding his silencer to his gun as he pads through the side corridor.

He lowers his gun when it turns out Nate is most definitely alone. The gun stowed away, he crosses his arms over his chest as he leans against the archway, appreciating the spectacle in front of him. Nate is still muttering curses under his breath, limping a bit and completely unaware of Harry watching him. He's also more or less stark bollock naked, holding some weird idol in his arms as if he's not quite sure what to do with the damned thing. Harry would easily bet it has something to do with the swearing and the limp. Nate isn't nearly as graceful as he'd like to think he is.

He's wearing only his holster and his boots, which Harry finds both alluring and strangely endearing.

"Did you do all this for my benefit?" he asks smoothly. Nate yelps in surprise and almost drops the idol.

"No, I did it because I get my thrills secretly flashing statues of Hindu deities."

He scowls at Harry and pretends to lob the damned thing towards him. Harry doesn't even flinch though, no way Nate would willingly risk damaging a priceless antiquity. The side effect of knowing Nate that well is he gets to appeal as cool as a cucumber.

"Mate, I've seen stranger things than that."

It's sort of true. He's heard about weirder kinks at least, but not actually seen anything quite as bizarre as a one of his lovers standing in front of an altar with clothes askew all over an ominous looking statue. It's certainly a statement of something on Nate's behalf. It's also slightly creepy, the idea of the statue watching them. He's not sure he'd actually take Nate up on it even if they did have the time, though he really doesn't like to turn opportunities down.

"What? Really? Wait, no, do I want to know or will I need brain bleach afterwards?"

"Depends on how curious you are,' Harry says as he gives Nate the once over completely unsubtly, 'If you like broadening your horizons you might find it entertaining."

"Thanks, but no thanks. I think I'll leave that conversation be for now."

Nate is much more vanilla than he'd expected, meaning easy to shock and he does so like to tease the guy about that every now and then. Sometimes it even turns out his teasing is planting ideas that will niggle at Nate until he decides he does want to give something a go, which is always extra fun. Nate's not taking the bait today though.

"Your loss," Harry says with a wink.

"Are you just gonna stand there and look or are you gonna take advantage of this, me, naked?" Nate asks incredulously.

"Oh, I am. It's not like I get to appreciate you like this very much, so I'll take my time if you please."

"I'm not sure it does please me, get over here already. And what are you talking about, you see me like this all the time."

"In the buff, oh yeah, sure but that's not what I meant. I meant – you, exposed in the middle of a freaking temple where anyone following us could walk in at any time. _For me_."

He saunters over to Nate, getting closer but nowhere near enough to touch him, nor for Nate to reach out to him either. He's keeping his hands to himself for a while longer, all the better to build the tension. He goes for giving Nate a good slow once round, eyeing up every inch of flesh on show hungrily.

"Uh, well, I was kind of counting on no one walking in. That was part of the point."

He stops as he comes to face Nate and reaches out finally, lacing his arms around Nate's neck and pressing himself against him.

"Angling for romance are we? Shame."

"Why's that?" Nate queries, sounding confused and irritated and possibly a bit hurt too.

"Because you should have realised we were trailed from Marin's house. She sent a text warning me, like I didn't already know. Not sure how you didn't notice. I was waiting to see when you'd cotton on but now I know what else was on your mind. Got a little preoccupied working up the nerve, didn't you?"

"As if," Nate scoffs, "I'm not scared of you, Flynn, and this isn't anything new, just a change of location. Anyway, how much of a lead do we have on them?"

"I didn't say it was me you were scared of."

Nate surprises him with a searing kiss, making sure to press his body against Harry more insistently. It's quite the temptation. Harry is slightly regretting that he's still clothed, he could've shucked off his garments too when he entered the chamber and they could be doing so much more than just snogging right now if he had done that, unwise as it would have been. He wants more of this but first they've got to get through what comes next and he's got his priorities straight at least. So, much to Nate's disappointment, Harry detaches himself from the embrace and briskly walks away, leaving Nate naked and pouty. He leans to one side of the doorway, watching as Nate sulkily retrieves his clothes. Just because they can't do anything risque right now there's no reason he can't enjoy a good perv on Nate before all his goods are packed back away under layers of boring and somewhat grimy cotton.

"To answer your question, love. Probably ten minutes but..." he takes his time to smirk and shake his head, "that was before you divulged yourself of your outerwear _and_ underwear. Just as well you kept your holster on."

The first shot rings out, flicking past Harry's figure and shattering a pot behind Nate. That wipes the smirk off his face and he pivots around into cover quick as can be, as Nate snatches the last of his clothing back from the altar. Nate curses as he hobbles over on his one good foot to the safer side of the room,"Fuck. Harry, tell me again why can't we go anywhere with out a firefight?"

"Your killer charm, people feel threatened by it."

"Ha ha. Nothing to do with your strategy of making more enemies than friends then?" he replies dryly as he takes up a stance next to Harry.

"Pot, kettle. Besides people don't even see me when you're about, Mister Nathan Drake, legend of the business. You're one hell of a nice distraction mind you."

He gives a quick squeeze of Nate's hand, that passes without comment leaving Nate looking a little stunned, before he's rolling across the floor to take up position on the other side of the archway.

"Shall we?" he asks dramatically, causing Nate to roll his eyes. But he nods too and they lean out to fire back, perfectly in sync.

"A tenner says we can't clear the temple in ten minutes."

"You're betting against us?"

"I'm a practical man."

"I don't have any pounds on me and I doubt you meant ten of the local change, so what are you angling for?"

"Well, I thought we could come to an arrangement involving your clothes."

"You only have to ask, Flynn."

"But that'd be no fun."

"Suit yourself. You're on."


End file.
